I’ve given advice before (A Little Advice, Introspective Advice, A Little More Advice), and while I’m not qualified to tell you what to do with your life, I can tell you some helpful things.
God’s idea is always better than yours. He sees all of time at once and knows everything about everything, so of course He would have the best plan that takes into account all the variables.
Curate and maintain a support system of trustworthy, loving family and friends who will be there for you when you need them. Be part of their support system when you can.
Socializing can be like eating; the quality of it will affect your health. Just like eating junk might get you by but won’t truly nourish you, hanging out with people who don’t really care about you might get you by but won’t really build you up. Just like eating junk will make you feel subpar, hanging out with junk people will make you feel subpar.
Maintain a relationship with God. Of all the people you could be friends with and have in your support system, God is the best one. While maintaining a relationship with God won’t make all your problems go away, it will make them easier to bear. They may even start to make sense.